Taipei Vakay

Chinese New Year provided us with a full week off of school, so we decided to travel north to Taipei, a city with a population of 16 million people. We figured that with that many people, something cool MUST be happening to celebrate the new year. I knew it was going to be a great trip when I saw the electric message board on the train wishing all the English speakers "Good Luck! and Good Healthy!" Its flattering that they make the attempt! Anywho, we started the trip off with a nice visit to the temple. It was great to put myself in the eternal frame of mind for a while. The temple always helps me with that.

We wandered over to the Chiang Kai-shek memorial where we had our pictures taken with dozens of different American-loving friends from all over Asia...mostly the Phillipines, Indonesia, and Korea. These folks repeatedly caught me watching the two girls in traditional dress and took the initiative to say hi to me. They, along with all other photograph buddies were unbeleivably friendly and excited to have a picture with Americans.

Taipei 101 is the tallest building in the world (although soon to be surpassed by a building in Dubai...that's no surprise...I mean the people made huge palm-tree-shaped islands for crying out loud.) The elevators are in the guiness book of world records for being the fastest in the world. We went from the 5th floor to the 89th floor in 37 seconds. I am usually more enthralled by natural beauty, but the ingenuity and human (God-given) genius presented in this building were captivating. Its amazing what knowledge will enable people to accomplish!


The National Palace Museum was a lot of fun and very educational. Why do those two have to be separated in my mind? Anywho, this lady was distributing information on a type of meditation called Falun Gong whose practicioners were being rounded up and killed in China. Supposedly they lacked a requisite permission slip that would allow them to gather in a group larger than 100 people. God Bless America!

We decided to have a "Who can get the cutest little kid picture?" contest. This was my first and, drum roll please, WINNING photo. What do you think? It was definitely a fun activity! I was extremely grateful for the language/cultural barriers in these situations, too. I could tell by the parents' body language that I was being a bit creepy, but since we couldn't communicate, I just fought through those awkward moments where we made eye contact and it was totally worth it!

This picture represents the most heartwarming portion of vacation. The three of us who remained in Taipei for an extra day were blessed to have the opportunity to help a young man with his Eagle Scout project. This little girl is an AIDS orphan who lives at this house called Harmony Homes Association. Many other children are in her situation and we were fortunate enough to be able to serve them. We worked on creating more outdoor playing space for them by adding sandboxes and preparing the roof for a bike race track and a hopscotch thingy. The best part, though, was when we just played with the kids. It reminded me of when I was in Ecuador where the kids are so many and the workers too few to render them the needed love and attention. It felt great to be able to brighten their day a bit!

The Taipei Zoo was awesome! Arwyn (maroon shirt) and Jaimie were my zoo buddies. We had fun trying to imitate or make up animal sounds for all the animals. What sound does a giraffe make? Try it. I met lots of cool people and was thus able to practice my German, Spanish and Chinese. Who would've thought, eh? God is a very creative being. The diversity and beauty in His creations were obvious to me during this visit.

One of my friends from the hostel we stayed in...Taiwanmex. It is called such because the guy who runs it is from mexico. I thought that was quite interesting. How does a Mexican end up running a business in Taiwan? Well, he met his wife when she visited Mexico. This is Diana from Singapore. She was like the hostel mom, always cutting up fruit for everyone, cleaning and making it feel like home. She was also my tour guide when we went to the Buddhist temple to pray on Chinese New Year's Eve. She explained all of the gods to me, what we were praying for and how prosperous i am going to be this next year. After all, it is the year of the cow (this could be your year, daddy!)
Mr. Yon from Korea...another hostel buddy. He was an entertaining soul with his sincere attempts at communication in English. He is an actor in Korea.

Taipei was great and I enjoyed getting to know so many different and unique people. Taiwan is touching my heart!

Fashion Freak

Yes, I did and will continue to wear this out in public. The general style here really suits me. I think I might be secretly Taiwanese, because they seem to do as I do when it comes to wearing clothes. It usually goes like this: MMM, What should I wear today? I really like my purple sweater, so I'll wear that. I also like my maroon corduroy pants. I'll put those on, too. My brown shoes are really comfortable. I HAVE to put those on. I really like the tie that guy gave me in Germany that he said was from his days in the army. Heil, put on the tie. I certainly can't waste the 1 dollar I spent on these sweet suspenders. They need to be used, so they find their way into my garb for the day....etc, etc, etc. One of the secretaries yesterday was wearing flaming purple tights underneath a brown plaid shirt dress thing with yellow shoes. Another one was wearing shin-high socks with tights, pink sandals, a shirt dress thing, and a nice jacket. I think they follow the same philosophy as I do...If you like it, wear it. It doesn't matter what you wear it with. (That's my friend derrick in the background)

Spaaaaa....AH!

Last night marked the second time we visited the local spa. Let me rephrase that...Last night marked the second time we visited the water wonderland replete with equipment to fill all your water massaging, spa soaking, steam room steaming, lap swimming, water slide sliding, ginger tea drinking, lavender and orange-scented hot tub soaking needs. Seriously, if you think it would be relaxing and good for your body and it has to do with water in any of its various forms, this place definitely has it...and lots of it!

How do you like the requisite swimcaps? A bright metallic blue one with gold and silver spots now calls my closet home. I think this may turn into a Saturday tradition for some of us. After spending the day biking close to 15 miles all while gaining approximately 1,500 feet in elevation, the spa sure felt like heaven.

The lady at the front desk probably thought so as well. I don't think I've ever been one to be ashamed of changing my clothes in front of other people at swimming places. Everyone has to do it, so it seems normal, right? Well, with absolutely no sense of trepidation I proceeded to disrobe and put on my swimsuit when my Taiwanese friend came running into the locker room to warn me about not doing so next time. He pointed to the corner of the room where the wall meets the ceiling where resided a small black globe. Yes, it was a camera. Supposedly they had a theft problem last week and decided to monitor the first compartment where people are drying their hair ONLY. I didn't know I was supposed to use a changing room! Let's hope the hoards of people gathered around the front desk didn't notice the prominently displayed security televisions with the not so prominently displayed naked white man!

This is one of the 4 orange farmers we met on our little bike adventure. I don't know if its because I told them that Dad is a dairy farmer and they then felt some sort of farmer connection, but all of them gave us tons of oranges. They were SO NICE! and patient with my attempts at Chinese. People seem to be very flattered that I am actually making an attempt and have been extremely helpful when I've practiced with them.


One of the casualties of the bike path. This grasshopper was literally the size of my face!


We explored this very ornate Buddhist Temple after descending from the monstrous hill we climbed. We felt we deserved a little break.


Aren't we a cute couple?

It was relaxing and refreshing to be out in the countryside with all of the farms and orchards. We stopped at a hot dog stand on the way home and the vendors suggested we take a few cloves of raw garlic to eat with our dogs. Mom, this is for you...I ate a whole one plain and then another one intermittently between bites of my hot dog. C'mon...you know you love it!

Giggling Girlies

Surprise! Dane thinks Taiwanese girls are adorable. This has thus far proven to be extremely beneficial to my language learning efforts. For some odd, inexplicable reason the intimidation that normally accompanies venturing to the edge of my verbal capacity is obliterated by the appearance of these attractive Asian angels. Ok, perhaps it can be explained with great facility, thanks to Microeconomics 2010 and Joe Baker. People respond to incentives! Its true and its economics. Something I learned in school DOES have real-life application. Praise Allah!

My fellow teachers seem to firmly believe I will follow the exact footsteps of our Branch President, which would entail: 1. Do a language exchange with a Taiwanese girl. 2. Marry this Taiwanese girl. 3. Start my own English school. 4. Become Branch President. 5. Upset my dear mother greatly as she has already forewarned me about establishing permanent residency here in Taiwan.....We shall see...

The three ladies in aprons were my language buddies last night at the restaurant. As we were pondering our menus, wondering what to eat, nature called and while doing the universally understood pee-pee dance seemed appealing, I really wanted the practice. So, I decided to ask in Chinese. With dictionary in hand and lust in my heart I proceeded to delay my bathroom visit by 20 minutes as I miraculously communicated some basic likes and dislikes with our waitress. Her boss is the one who took the picture and instead of sticking with the traditional, "One, Two, Three," he said, "A, B, C." We Americans nearly died laughing.

To listen to my pump-me-up-about-being-in-Taiwan song, go to youtube and look up:
Ilha Formosa: Taiwan will touch your heart. Click on the first one.

One, Two, Three...English Please!

One of the most fundamental rules here at the school is the English only rule. Children are to be held more strictly to this rule than to any other, it seems. My question is, "How do I know if they are speaking Chinese?" Their attempts at communication in English are no more comprehensible than their Chinese sometimes. But, what can you expect from these little guys? The kindergartners wander around muttering...I want, I want, I want and the older students speak mostly chinglish (english words with chinese grammar) i.e. "This is what?" "Mr. Dane is where?" etc.

Clarification: Kindergarten here is much more heterogeneous than in the states. Some of my children still have their baby fat, while others roam around like giants compared to their classmates. Three year olds in a language class is a great idea, by the way! We can learn a lot from the Chinese educational system. Yesterday while squeezing one of said baby fat carrying toddler's cheeks, I remarked, "You have BIG cheeks." There was not one moment's hesitation with the innocent reply, "You have a big NOSE!" Children everywhere are fascinated by my nose. One student was rubbing it today with a look of great fascination. I could tell he was really thinking and wanted to tell me something but didn't know quite how to articulate. Finally, after polishing my honker for a full minute out came, "Teacher Dane, you have a sharp nose." What would they say about Dad's nose? (luv ya dad)

This job is also great for my self esteem. We are encouraged to teach the children how to speak in first person, so while reviewing their spelling words I came up with the following dialogue:
"Beautiful. Am I beautiful? Yes, I am beautiful." Shouts of rebuttal rang through the classroom. "Teacher, you not beautiful. You stinky." I was hoping the next word would evoke a more pleasant reaction. "Cute. Am I cute? Yes I am cute. I am cute and beautiful." Cue: rotten tomatoes and lettuce. Oh well, can't please everyone, eh? Although, I must say that one of my students obviously likes me because when given an assignment to write comparisons in his journal while observing me, he wrote, "Teacher Dane is more handsomer than me." His little 12 year old girlfriends strongly disagreed. Oh the days of young romance!

My teaching schedule:

Monday 8:30-11:30 Morning Kindergarten 130-400 Basic Reading
Tuesday 8:30-11:30 Morning Kindergarten 440-640 4th grade
Wednesday 830-1130 Morning Kindergarten 130-400 Basic Reading 650-850 9th grade writing
Thursday 130-400 basic reading 440-640 4th grade
Friday 130-400 Basic reading 650-850 writing
Saturday (tell me about it!) 8-10 4th grade



(I don't think this picture does justice to the humongous size of this bowl. It was HUGE! This is Joseph and I eating out and a temple...the lanterns had characters about heavenly mother on them.)

FOOD FOOD FOOD

Taiwan is one of the few places I know of where it is cheaper to eat out than it is to go grocery shopping and buy your own food. For example, yesterday I ate this ramen noodle dish that I bought at the store. Now before you go asking yourselves how desperate I must be, allow me to explain. Derrick, who lived here for 2 years was shopping with me when I bought it and highly recommended the ramen. Its like american ramen on steroids. The one I bought was extra spicy and came with little beef and vegetable chunks. Plus, the noodles are much thicker than their american counterparts. Needless to say, this ramen was not your typical college-student-too-poor-to-buy-anything-decent ramen. It cost me $50NT, which equates to approximately $1.50. Then, add the bread and cheese I used to supplement the meal which was not enough to sustain me and I probably spent about $70NT. The same night I went to a fancy Thai restaurant in the shopping center and got a huge plate of chicken chili basil rice and a coconut mango milk dessert for $130 NT. Ok, so I said it was cheaper....well it CAN be. This restaurant was a little more fancy than others and I will ALWAYS pay a little extra for good Thai food! But, the night previous, I ate pregnant breaded fish, marinated fish, squid and tons of vegetables for $70NT---the exact price of my ramen lunch. Now, whether I am consciously or subconsciously playing with the numbers to justify eating out everyday is not the question. Come on, what would you do if your employer gave you $100NT everyday to spend on food? Meals for 2 american dollars that taste just as good as any 15 dollar a plate restaurant...This place rocks!! The question is...chicken kidney or congealed pig's blood? Can you guess which one I've already eaten?

Too much of a good thing...

is a good thing, right? I would be contradicting obvious evidence that has been presented in the last few days if I argued differently. What I am asking is, "Can you ever eat too many whole fish coated in batter that openly display their pregnancies when you bite into them? How many deep-fried fish guts are too many?"

Well, after a pleasant 14-plus hour plane ride a few days ago, I arrived in Taiwan. Humorously enough, not one solitary person out of the 9 of us coming to teach at Berhan Language Institute had the remotest sense of what we were supposed to do once we disembarked. People passing definitely wondered, as did we, "What are these people doing?" It must have looked at least somewhat odd to have 9 gringos with 3 bags each standing obtrusively near the airport exit. We stood in stunned silence for a measure of time until Arwyn (female teacher) piped up mentioning some obscure email about directions about our journey from airport to home. The bus we rode in was delightful! There's no better way to bring in the new year than by watching Mrs. Doubtfire with Chinese subtitles, while riding in a luxurious, green-curtained bus----not to mention the awesome fireworks we were able to see out the windows.

As I was trying to explain to my new roommates (Derrick and Joseph) last night, the newness of everything makes each moment noteworthy, so how am I supposed to decipher what is actually worthy of writing and what is not?

These are just some of the things that are interestingly new that I cannot perceive will possible become old: 1. The Taiwanese secretaries giggling at every mention of the word 'single'. B. Hearing the garbage truck, which sounds eerily exactly like an ice cream truck. (We were in the middle of a get-to-know-you session with the secretaries yesterday when I heard it for the first time and at once the whole flock of secretaries went running outside, completely abandoning what we were doing. YES! Ice cream! I was salivating, only to be disappointed by being assigned to carry large pieces of soggy cardboard...so much for ice cream. I still like the excitement the sound creates, though). 4. Riding a purple girl's bike through the city where our trainer, who's lived here for 8 years, says, "They pay no attention to the red lights oftentimes." Its like a real-life frogger every time I saddle up. D. Smiling, giving the thumbs up and peace signs in an attempt to make my limited Chinese more understandable. Language barriers have always intrigued me. Now, about those fish guts....